13 Nov

Posted at 10:00h by
After the InsightAfter an important insight into why you act the way you do, the long process of changing your behavior begins, one action at a time. Most people find it difficult to change without outside support, and if that is you, it doesn’t mean you’re weak or wrong in some way, merely a member of the human race. Here are ten suggestions for finding support: 1. Keep a journal - Writing down your thoughts and feelings while

06 Nov

Posted at 10:00h by
After The Insight Part IBack in the days when Freudian lying-on-the-couch therapy was all there was, insight into one’s problem was considered enough to provide a cure. However, insight-as-cure didn’t turn out to be the case – we’ve all heard about Woody Allen in treatment for decades, his neurosis only growing. Many people walk around with great insight into why they do what they do, baffled as to how to use the information to change their lives. Caitlin understands there’s a correlation between her father’s abusiveness and her attraction to unkind men, but still she continues to date them. Josh knows

30 Oct

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual_therapy_dynamic_meditationWhen most people hear the word “meditation,” they envision a serenely calm person sitting blissfully, probably with their legs crossed in the lotus position. What is going on inside that meditator’s head, however, may be a different story. Their mind is most likely struggling and overwhelmed with its many dramas, anxieties, and infatuations. Many people can’t stick with a meditation practice because it is just too darn uncomfortable. The benefits of meditation have been well documented: reduced stress, better health, concentration, spontaneity and creativity. There are purported psychological and spiritual benefits, such as

23 Oct

Posted at 08:32h by
spiritual therapistSteven is remembering the active days of what he calls his sex addiction: “I was at a party and noticed this overweight, not so beautiful woman across the room who was obviously attracted to me.” He drums his fingers on the table. “I did my number on her and got her to go out to the barn behind the house where we had sex, then we went back inside to the party. Later, I remember I glanced over at her and she was crying.” He breaks eye contact and

16 Oct

Posted at 07:36h by
What Do We Mean By spiritual Relationship“WIIFM” is the primary motivator for many people in their relationships. WIFFM is a marketing term for “What’s In It For Me?” We have been taught to value people for how good they will look on our arm, how close they come to our fantasy of the ideal lover, or how we imagine they will fulfill our desires. It’s about how it all looks, right? Except that when we focus on the outside, nobody is going to be good enough because everyone is flawed. Everybody. This is why we love the tabloids -- we get to see seemingly perfect celebrities

09 Oct

Posted at 09:00h by
mindfulness_therapy_a_little_offSure, I know, there’s work, and working out, and eating right, and the economy, and relationship struggles, and, and, and, … and then if you have kids, there’s even more. What a balancing act! Sometimes it’s a wonder we have any energy left for sex at all. To make sure it doesn’t get that way for you, learn to become better at managing your stress. Here are some tips:

25 Sep

Posted at 09:12h by
Non-Drug Alternative for DepressionMany of my patients do not want to take medication and I support their efforts to find a holistic solution. Here are my top recommendations: 1) Exercise: Believe it or not, exercise has been found to be the most effective treatment for depression. Of course, that’s the last thing you feel like doing when you’re feeling down. The minimum recommendation is

18 Sep

Posted at 08:03h by
Four Ways Spirituality Can Hurt YouDon’t get me wrong – spirituality is a good thing. In today’s world, most people could benefit from becoming more in touch with their spirituality, not less. In my practice, however, I see ways that new age spirituality is hurting people. Here are things to look out for: 1) You believe that by thinking positively or by saying affirmations, life will follow your whims and dictates. In psychology, we call this ‘magical thinking.’ In reality, it takes a lot of hard work to accomplish your dreams, to live the life to which you aspire. Thinking right is an important part of the process, but it is only the

11 Sep

Posted at 08:41h by
spiritual_emergencyI got a call earlier this week from a couple trying to get help for a beloved friend who was unable to get off the couch due to experiencing visions, flashes of color and light, sensations of energy coming out of her body, and ecstatic trance states. She also believes that the Messiah has returned, and it is she. The couple had found me through Google as a ‘transpersonal’ therapist, or one who has had training in assessing and treating what is called “spiritual emergency.” For although their friend has a history of severe mental illness, many of her symptoms are the same or similar as those of spiritual awakening. She was also experiencing evidence of a broader spiritual understanding, of increased compassion, of expansiveness, of the knowledge that everything is made of swirling energy, and that she has an important role to play on earth. Unfortunately,

28 Aug

Posted at 09:04h by
mindfulness_therapy_holidaysThroughout yoga class, Jennifer feels fat. She’s obsessed with the other women’s bodies - how much thinner, limber, and more beautiful they are. Afterwards, at Whole Foods she buys a package of Organic Fig Bars and a pint of Carob Almond Rice Dream, goes home, eats it all, and throws up. Self-hatred quickly follows. Kyle is late on his rent again, and can’t be sure he’s not overdrawn. It’s always this chaos, every month. That reservation he made for the weeklong meditation retreat was more than he could afford – but maybe