04 Feb

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual_therapist_relationshipsPhilip Larkin, one of the great poets of the twentieth century, famously wrote: Your mum and dad, they fuck you up, They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the fears they had, And add some extra just for you. Everyone could benefit from identifying where their parents “f*cked” them up and working through it. In fact, being clear of non-useful parental programming is an essential milestone on the psychological and spiritual path. If you’re stuck with pain, upset, or

28 Jan

Posted at 10:00h by
Yin and Yang of SexThe adorable young woman sitting in front of me has been sent by her boyfriend for counseling because she doesn’t orgasm in a few minutes as a porn star pretends to. The main source of sex education for many young people these days is online porn, and much misinformation is being disseminated. The major inaccuracy is that yang sex is all there is: sex is only about looking a certain way, vigorous activity, technique, and performance. There is no place for sensual exploration, non-goal oriented play, or relaxation in the presence of the beloved. Very few

22 Jan

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual therapistI never saw such eyes as he had: soft, velvety, bleeding with impersonal love. When you passed Videha in the walkway, he was not like the rest of us, happily anxious to connect with a friendly face. No, Videha kept his eyes to himself. When I lived in India for a year, one of the disciplines I practiced was Sufi whirling, the powerful method of remembrance of God danced by the whirling dervishes. Through it, I learned

14 Jan

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual_therapy_yin_yangPole dance classes at your local “Y,” burlesque and striptease billed as “female empowerment,” fetish shoes worn as ordinary daywear, cougars on the prowl, and porn star sex not only ubiquitous on the Internet but expected in every bedroom – contemporary sex is all about the yang. You’ve seen the yin/yang symbol: the white and black teardrops coexisting inside a circle, each half complimenting the other, each

07 Jan

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual therapistAfter living in LA on-and-off for thirty years, I’ve fallen in love with the Hollywood Bowl. Many nights this summer if you trek way up to the cheap seats, you’ll find me sitting with any number of friends drinking a little wine, eating a little snack, and luxuriating in world-class music for a buck. At least once during the program, I’ll consider how I’m the luckiest person in the world to be lounging in perfect LA weather, admiring the silhouette of the hills against the sky, and enjoying

31 Dec

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual therapistYou’re enjoying the perfect stroll along the beach: the crunch of sand between your toes, the lapping waves, the glorious sun on your face. You notice the wind caressing your hair -- suddenly you hear cries for help! – the agony of a fellow being beginning to drown. Your impulse is to heroically swim out, drag the person to shore, provide mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and thereby save their life. Have you heard about this? That’s the exact thing you must not do. Unless

25 Dec

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual therapistThe thing that makes the holidays the most difficult is the widespread idea that they shouldn’t be. We’ve been seduced for years by pictures of smiling families passing the turkey and opening their flawlessly wrapped presents. Everyone is easy to get along with and everyone is perfectly happy. Nothing could be further from the truth for most people. We are far more complicated creatures than that. All families have their areas of dysfunction which are less likely to politely stay

17 Dec

Posted at 10:00h by
tantra_spiritual_psychologyOne tantric exercise you can practice at home is to envision your lover as the god or goddess they truly are. That may seem a bit farfetched in today’s world, as modern lovers are well too aware of what is “wrong” with their partner. Constantly bombarded with images of what the perfect lover looks like, talks like, kisses like, and makes love like, we compare and analyze and find our partners not measuring up. Since it is hard for a mere human being to

10 Dec

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual therapistFirst of all, do not ask her if she wants to have sex. This question will go straight to her head, which is not where you want to be. Second, long before you want to have sex, let her know how much you like her body. Start complimenting the day before, the week before, better yet, make it a constant thing. In this culture where advertising and magazines are constantly telling us we are not measuring up, all women are insecure about

03 Dec

Posted at 10:00h by
spiritual_therapist_evolveTantra is about making love into an art. If you thought of yourself as an artist of love, what would you create? If you were painting a picture of the most juicy, delicious, perfect afternoon with your beloved, composing a song, or sculpting a masterpiece, how would you honor them? Tantric lovers take their time. They are not in a hurry. Tantra has everything to do with savoring the moment, and bringing awareness to every detail. Noticing what you’ve never noticed before. Did you ever consider that