It’s all up to me if I love you or not; it's not up to you. It actually has nothing to do with you whatsoever. It has everything to do with whether my heart's open to love or not. So when I'm sitting across from you at a coffee date and we're meeting for the first time or the tenth time, it's not about whatever characteristics and
Sophisticated conventional daters will sooner or later come across the mindset that “dating is a series of rejections” and that to be successful dater, it’s about getting okay with the inevitable. One aphorism you’ll hear is “if you want to get more comfortable with rejection, go out and get rejected five times,” -- the idea being that you will learn to stop taking it so
I know it's quite popular, but I don't agree with this concept that certain people are toxic. It doesn't make any sense to me at all to label people that way; I find it harsh and inaccurate. Perhaps it might be helpful to label some behaviors that people do as “toxic” so that we learn to develop strong boundaries, but the appointing of some beings as “toxic” is often
An attitude I came to while hanging out at the Ashram and basking in the tantric atmosphere was we're all spiritual brothers and sister helping each other grow. I'd never thought of the men I was involved with this way, so it was revolutionary, and I'd never been in an environment where men and women treated each other as such. It was beautiful and loving in stark contrast to conventional dating where everyone considers each other either a candidate for the
Conventional dating in and of itself encourages us to think there's something wrong with other people and something wrong with us. Other people don't look right, and you don't look right. They're not lovable, and you're not lovable. They don't have the cool moves; you don't have the cool moves. The conventional mindset encourages us to see other people and ourselves as weird and
When most people hear the word “tantra” they think of sex, and often here in the Western world you’ll see “tantra” used as a marketing term, such as come to this or buy this because it's TANTRA, you've seen this right? Actually, Osho, who was a spiritual teacher and Tantra Master from India, explained it this way: At the essence, all teachings basically boil down to one of two paths to God, enlightenment, realization, whatever term you want to use: the Yogic or the
The young woman sitting in front of me in my psychotherapy office is articulate, intelligent, well groomed and attractive. Jessica has also thrown up her food three times a day, every day, since puberty. “I have to be prettier,” she says. “I just can’t go on looking like this.”
We might think Jessica’s anxiety is all in her head, but a disturbing
Pole dance classes at your local “Y,” burlesque and striptease billed as “female empowerment,” fetish shoes worn as ordinary daywear, cougars on the prowl, and porn star sex not only ubiquitous on the Internet but expected in every bedroom – contemporary sex is all about the yang.
You’ve seen the yin/yang symbol: the white and black teardrops coexisting inside a circle, each half complimenting the other, each
Great psychologists such as Sigmund Freud and Wilhelm Reich pointed out that the majority of people are starved for sexual fulfillment; causing all kinds of ills such as child abuse, rape, frigidity, compulsive sexuality, and obsessions of all sorts. This starvation, however, is not from lack of opportunity as it was in the past. The modern world offers plenty of images of sexuality, plenty of messages that to be sexually active is to be healthy, but little information about the connection between love, spirituality, and sex. Pornography has replaced nourishing sharing. The worship of lust has