Sure, I know, there’s work, and working out, and eating right, and the economy, and relationship struggles, and, and, and, … and then if you have kids, there’s even more. What a balancing act! Sometimes it’s a wonder we have any energy left for sex at all. To make sure it doesn’t get that way for you, learn to become better at managing your stress. Here are some tips:
Many of my patients do not want to take medication and I support their efforts to find a holistic solution. Here are my top recommendations:
1) Exercise: Believe it or not, exercise has been found to be the most effective treatment for depression. Of course, that’s the last thing you feel like doing when you’re feeling down. The minimum recommendation is
I got a call earlier this week from a couple trying to get help for a beloved friend who was unable to get off the couch due to experiencing visions, flashes of color and light, sensations of energy coming out of her body, and ecstatic trance states. She also believes that the Messiah has returned, and it is she.
The couple had found me through Google as a ‘transpersonal’ therapist, or one who has had training in assessing and treating what is called “spiritual emergency.” For although their friend has a history of severe mental illness, many of her symptoms are the same or similar as those of spiritual awakening.
She was also experiencing evidence of a broader spiritual understanding, of increased compassion, of expansiveness, of the knowledge that everything is made of swirling energy, and that she has an important role to play on earth. Unfortunately,
Throughout yoga class, Jennifer feels fat. She’s obsessed with the other women’s bodies - how much thinner, limber, and more beautiful they are. Afterwards, at Whole Foods she buys a package of Organic Fig Bars and a pint of Carob Almond Rice Dream, goes home, eats it all, and throws up. Self-hatred quickly follows.
Kyle is late on his rent again, and can’t be sure he’s not overdrawn. It’s always this chaos, every month. That reservation he made for the weeklong meditation retreat was more than he could afford – but maybe
I often send my single patients to Starbucks to sit and people watch, in a different way than they are used to. I ask them to scan for people who look kind, responsible, trustworthy: the type of person, for example, who thinks it would be fun to coach Little League after work. People often get all tangled up in their love lives because the kind of person who would make a good parent to their future kids does not look like the person who fuels their erotic
“When in doubt…” was a slogan on a card I received that I’ve never thrown out because it makes me laugh every time I see it. That would be an easy out, right? You don’t need to accept responsibility for yourself because your parents made you the way you are. If you do something harmful to yourself or someone else, it’s not your fault, it’s your
“When I’m listening to bossa nova, it seems like everything’s right with the world.” I was talking to my therapist of the time about my (then) chronic depression. I hadn’t been seeing him that long and we were still finding out if it was a fit. “That slinky slide,” I said, “that bittersweet quality, that sexy smooth sunlight-on-the-beach thing. You get the feeling that whatever happens with the world, it’ll be okay.” I looked
Many people who come to see me announce that they have already forgiven the people who hurt them, so the work is done. They’ve read in spiritual books that forgiveness is the key, so wanting to be good people, they are anxious to forgive and forget. Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.
This type of forgiveness is done from the level of the mind, by making a decision to think about the situation differently, which is as helpful as putting a Band-Aid on a broken arm. The pain
I used to feel bad about being an introvert. It’s just really supremely nerdy to prefer to stay home and read. I was born that way, though, what can I say. Even when I was little I remember my mother yelling at me, “Cathy, stop reading and go outside and play.” In a minute, Mom, in a minute. After I finish this paragraph, this chapter, this 800-page book.
America is an extravagantly extroverted culture. People are judged on their social skills, their level of apparent happiness and “positivity,” and their lack