You Don’t Need to Love Yourself First

You Don't Have to Love Yourself“You have to love yourself first before you can love anyone else.” Justin is saying this as his explanation for why he’s still single. It’s an adage we’ve all heard a zillion times, haven’t we? I used to blindly believe it myself — I’d heard it over and over and read it in self-help books, so it must be true.

It’s considered so absolutely right, it’s not even questioned. I hear it frequently quoted by my patients and friends. But think it through with me:

Many people out there in long-term relationships don’t particularly love themselves, and didn’t love themselves before they got paired up either. They didn’t wait until Read More

Mental Health Apps

Mental Health AppsGive up your therapist? Not quite yet. But some exciting new trends in self help can be easily accessed right from your phone.

Most mobile phone apps are intended as an adjunct to therapy rather than a replacement for it. Patients can learn to relax themselves, monitor their moods, and attend 12-step meetings. Even the Veteran Affairs National Center has developed an app for Read More

Don’t Believe What You Think

Don't Believe What You ThinkThere are many reasons we practice meditation. One of the most widely touted is its ability to help us manage stress and feel relaxed. This is all well and good; however, I think the most important benefit is that it teaches us to break our identification with our minds. We watch; we breathe; we observe our thoughts float by like clouds. When a particular thought captures our attention, Read More

Top Ten Non-Drug Treatments for Anxiety

Non-Drug Treatments for Anxiety & DepressionMany of my patients do not want to take medication for anxiety and I support their efforts to find a holistic solution. Here are my top recommendations for non-drug treatments for anxiety:

1) Practice some deep, slow breaths, all the way down, pushing your abdomen out. There’s a reason the Buddha is always pictured as having a big belly – belly breathing produces calm, chill people. Yoga and meditation classes can Read More

Give More than You Get

Give More Than You GetBack in the 90s, I studied with Robert Kiyosaki, the multimillionaire author of the Rich Dad series of financial advice books. He was “only” worth four million at the time, years before he became much richer and world famous. Robert taught us that the number one thing he attributed his success to was tithing, the practice of giving away ten percent of your money. Even when his business tanked Read More

Madison’s Apple Tree

Madison's Apple TreeMadison is as wide eyed as any child has ever been watching her seedling push its way up out of the Styrofoam cup. Like many kindergarten kids in America, her class has planted apple seeds and is waiting for them to grow. The children tend the plants lined up on the windowsill, learning that they require water, sunlight, and tender loving care. The students are taught about photosynthesis, and the making of chlorophyll. Mostly, they learn Read More